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Creepy Old Magazine Ads

Creepy Old Magazine Ads

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    “Bread is swell, but what I’m really excited about is eating jelly made from the blood of the innocent!”
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    It’s enough to make you want to eat Kosher forever.
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    It’s nice to have a girl around the house… especially if you are a psychopath serial killer who makes women into rugs!
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    Who needs self-esteem when you can have a free fashion book for chubbies? Also, proving that advertising weight representation has always been screwed up, the girl pictured is hardly chubby.
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    The family that guns together, has funs together.
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    Is that eye patch supposed to be sexy? Or was there bad accident with kitty earlier?
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    She totally deserves it. Seriously, what kind of woman doesn'’t “store test” for fresher coffee?
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    Nothing wants to make consumers buy chocolate more than 5 faces of a sickly kid looking 5 different shades of miserable.
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    Mama, please DO NOT give your baby another glass of Root Beer. It is clearly doing something horrible to him. He is terrifying.
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    You better wash out your coochie with Lysol, or your husband will install cartoon locks on the door. See full size
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    “Pears Soap- now with such a soothing lather, you won’t notice that your baby has gotten into a horrible accident!”
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    “Is it always illegal to kill a woman?” This is a truly important question and makes us want to buy a new postage meter.
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    The old man baby’s gonna sing karaoke into a razor! Hooray!
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    JonBenét Ramsey, eat your heart out. (Too soon?) This ad makes us want to gouge out our eyes.
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    Drink that cocoa, or this clown will murder you in your sleep.